Baghdad's Mistress
4/14/2005
 
I think it is better for me do divide my posts into three section. First to deal with the comments, then another section to deal with my current life, then another section to tell my past stories.
But for you to understand my current situation, you have to know some knowledge about my past.
American music rocked Baghdad this morning, just at the time I woke up. Anyways Here is what the critics say about this blog :
- There is no lawyers in Iraq to deal with divorce cases.
You must think Iraq and especially Baghdad, the capital of civilization for centuries, is like Kabul ?! You can get married in a court, and you can get married with a Sheikh. If you want a legal marriage, the court is there for you. Then when I mentioned "Called lawyers", I left something for your imagination. If you don't have the ability to imagine how that happened, you may need to see a doctor or a psychiatrist. Me and my husband did not sit on the sofa thinking "Oh, let me call the lawyers and get divorced." He was constantly beating me before the divorce. I was a young teen, not a grown up woman. I left his tiny home and went back to my parents' house. My dad was an educated man and didn't believe in Sheikhs. He encouraged me to read Jibran Khaleel Jibran's books since I was 10. He called a friend who was a lawyer, and told him to file a case against my husband in which I demanded a divorce. The bastard would not let me go. Look at this mentality, if he doesn't say "I divorce you, I divorce you, I divorce you" you are still his wife. I went through a lot of hells for that which I didn't want to go into details. I am not going into details of every incident just because there are some backward people who can not accept that there are women in Iraq who are working as mistresses (I wouldn't use the degrading words of whore etc).
- There are no Channel clothes in Iraq
Honey you are right. If you have been shopping in Shorjah and Suq (Arabic Market) you are %110 right. But if you have been shopping in Karada and Jadiriyah etc you would have found not just Channel, but every other single world fashion design in some of the shops.

Now back to the past.

For the other day, after my boring long lectures at university, I moved my way towards Sadoun. I found the restaurant XY and went in.
Waiter - Hello Madam have a seat.
- Er... (I didn't know how to start to ask for the boss).
Waiter- (didn't give me a second to say a word). We have the best food. Have a seat let me get you a Bard (bard means cold and it is slang for Pepsi or Cola).
- Sorry I am not here to eat. Thank you.
Waiter- (Looking at my chest). So what are you here for then ?!
-Can I speak with the boss ?! Mr. A
Waiter- Yeah sure sure. Sorry Madam. Are you his daughter ? Sorry Madam.
- Can I speak to him ?!
Waiter- Sure sure this way Madam. He is in his office Madam. Sorry Madam.

I went in and introduced myself to Mr. A as J's friend.
Mr. A- I was waiting for you. I am sorry for all that happened. I was your dad's friend too. They left us in a very sad way. These drivers nowadays drive to murder.
- (when he mentioned my parents, I started to cry).
Mr. A- Oh don't cry my daughter. They are with God now. You should be proud of your dad. He didn't hurt even a fly in his life. He only had his books. What a nobel man he was.
- Thank you uncle. (I just called him uncle and it was very strange as I have never had one).
Mr. A- J told me about your situation and I know how hard life must be for you. If you have free time in the evening, you can come and work until 9 or 10. I will pay you for the whole day just like my other workers.
- Thank you uncle. But I like to be paid for what I do.
Mr. A- No no my daughter. You are a great girl just like your dad. If you had exams you can tell me and I let you go early. Sometimes my son will be here I will tell him to do the same if I wasn't here.
- Thank you so much uncle I really don't know how to thank you.
Mr. A- (Shouting - Ali Ali. Get us 2 chaii - teas -). OK the job is very easy. I know how our customers are. You can serve and take orders from the families who come here. They are not a lot, but we always do have some families and women in the restaurant.
- Sure uncle.
Ali- (entering the room) Here you go Sir. I didn't put sugar as you always order. I put sugar for the Madam.
At this moment the tea arrived. Mr. A a man in his sixties, started to tell me a story about my dad....
"Once ...."
Rest of the story for another day.
Comments:
Dear IM,

Like you said, Baghdad is not Kabul; therefore, EVERY marriage is registered in the court, even a marriage by the Sheikh will be registered!

Suq means the area where shops are. I.e. when you go shopping you say "I am going to the suq", and that could mean anything from shorjah to karada.

There are three karadas! which one are you refering to?

I know the area (karada and jadiriyah) pretty well, where is this chanel shop? Or which shop did you use to buy chanel clothes from?
 
3aini hesa ma3lena ib hai altafahat. khali niltiqee ani o inti. i can be your little iraqi slave. shitgooleen? LOL. wallah i'm a rich spoiled young man.
 
to all you iraqi's, male and female--how about dropping all the crude, insulting comments to this young woman and just listening? every human being feels sex drive once thier hormones flow in the puberty years, and we all find our outlets in whatever ways life presents. your soil YOURSELVES by invoking all this crudity. we all committ the act at some point, married or not. the body does not know the difference whether there are papers in place to call the act by some name.
do flowers get married? does any other form of life on earth? the answer is no. your judging is unfounded. it's said to make YOU feel superior--and you are not. not a one of us is. don't step on someone. lend a hand and help them up again.
 
IM, you definitely need to tell your story. It's theraputic for you to unburden yourself of it. It's important for the world and especially the Americans to find out what the years of sanctions caused to happen in people's lives. It's important for you to tell it like this so that women-your sisters- all over the world can come forward and befriend you and let you discover the immense solidarity you never knew you had in support, with women all over the world. We have been at this a long time. Those of us out here in the so-called 'enlightened' nations of the world have fouhgt long and hard for the rights and freedoms we have today, and have broken thru the lines of male domination to take our rightful place as humans in the big picture. Keep telling your story. It's your life, as you lived it, and it's valuable.
If you don't want to post your email address for the public, then take those of us you would be willing to talk with from our posts and write to us privately. You have friends. You have sisters here who would be ready to bond and share with you--making your weight lighter and your relief the greater.
"whatever you can do, or think you can, begin it. genius has power, and magic in it."
 
janet at venice beach, why don't you want to listen? We are not attacking this person because she is (supposedly) a prostitute. we attack him/her because they are lying and trying to fool people, and this whole blog is one big joke except for gullible people such as yourself. this person has been in iraq but has not grasped anything at all about iraqi society.

There are so many problems in this blog that only Iraqis can recognize. It just gets more obvious with every new post. just try getting that in your thick head. not one Iraqi in these comments believes this person is who he pretends to be. doesn't that look suspicious to you?

We are not attacking her because she is a prostitute. prostitutes exist in Iraq just like everywhere else, no one is deniying this.
 
I just want you to know that I feel for you. I spent 6 months in Baghdad myself helping restore water and sewer. I think of the many Iraqi's I worked with on a daily basis. They are some of the nicest people in the world and I truley miss them. I can not imagine having been through what most of them have been through the past 20 years, not to mention what they go through on a daily basis not to get to and from work. Nearly everyone has lost someone dear to them to Sadamm. I'm sure many of them have done things they are not proud of. Even though things are rough now, you can't help but to be hopeful about Iraq's future after meeting her people. To those reading this blog and seeing some of the comments I will point out that although there may be things only an Iraqi would notice, that there is an effort out there to discredit many Iraqi bloggers. And going back to previous posts, there are many absolutely beautiful women in Iraq.
 
to those of you who are iraqis, who are reading this blog and spotting all the things you say could never happen in iraq, I point you to Zeyad's blog "Healing Iraq", and the hue and cry that went up from Americans when Zeyad reported the actions of the drunk soldiers who stopped his cousins for curfew violation and then forced them off the bridge into the waters of the dam. Americans cried "Oh, no, our boys would never do a thing like that--this can't be true". And as time brought out the court martial, it turned out that yes,sadly, it was true. So make your lists of things you're sure prove that this blog can't be true, but hold your judgement in reserve. Life is full of discoveries that blow our minds and end our illusions.
And the crudities you utter at this writer, tho you mean them in cruel sport at one female, you don't realize that all females reading your words take it the same as if you spoke it to any of us. If you think that of one, you are capable of holding that view of all of us. It's quite offensive.
At least, I hear it that way.
 
I love Baghdad's Mistress! Keep on writing...
 
ummm....why is it that since Saddam fell, Baghdad Mistress cannot get work?

Prostitution is not a political appointment unless you work for the UN.
 
Mistress,

Not sure how you feel about the occupation, but you do speak and write English. There are plenty of jobs for translators in the reconstruction, and they probably pay a lot more than waiting tables.
 
There are plenty of jobs for translators in the reconstruction, and they probably pay a lot more than waiting tables.

THAT is an excellent suggestion. But our guys can be pigs too, so practice up on your right hook. ;)
 
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